Thanksgiving Fun

I love Thanksgiving..

Of course there's the food....





When the family is together... we sing!




The brothers playing ping pong.... they still got it after all these years...






Enjoying Grandma's backyard..








And finally, helping Grandma set up her tree....






It was a wonderful day! We love you Magnusson family!

It's been awhile

Amazing how quickly time passes. What happened to the month of October? A busy month full of fun, tears, laughs, and busy busy busy!

Two beautiful women in my life came to visit. We are friends, we need each other. We are sisters. Being the middle sister has it's perks. One older, one younger, I learn so much from both. Our bond is strong us three... we've been through much over the years.. each struggling with childhood memories, handling our memories in differing ways. One sister closes herself off from family and close relationships, the other controls her food to a point of starving. I can't live without either of these women. I am blessed with them in my life. We cry, we giggle, we shop, we craft. We enjoy each moment.. isn't that what life is about? The world needs sisters!

Wayne came home for the weekend.. to see Kayli swim at state. Kayli continues to amaze us with her talents, and humble spirit. She never expects to do well in her events, yet she is always outstanding!

Kayli's relay team did not win state, did not medal in state, BUT they broke the school record, for which we are all SO PROUD! Personal best is always a win! She got sick with the flu during soccer tryouts. The coaches will let her try out next week when she's better... but her humble spirit is worried. Those little thoughts of not being good enough always creep into her mind. She is talented, and as I assure her of that, I'm reminded of Kayli as a baby. Back when we were not sure she would live out the month. Back when she was first in our home, a 10 pound 8 month old... fighting to live. Fighting at times to breathe.... and I look at her now, swimming at state, trying out for soccer again, and I'm so grateful to have her in our lives. Her humble spirit is an example to us all. She will make the team, she will run and breathe, and do her personal best.. because that is who she is!

And the month also brought hope. Wayne is applying for a humanitarian transfer back here... back home. He is not due to come home until the end of May 2010. He is also on 2 lists to head to Afghanistan in May 2010, and could be gone another year. Not sure this body or mind can handle 2 1/2 years being a single parent, with one very challenging child. So... my rhuematologist wrote the Air Force a letter, filled out paperwork, and magically... Wayne may be home by mid December. I'm not grateful to be sick, but I have hope. Amazing how one letter can change things.

So, though it's been awhile... life has continued to go on. Experiences are everywhere. I wake up, I go to sleep... every day. I make the best of each day. How grateful I am that I have children to keep me busy, I have a missionary who is loving where he's at, and a grandbaby who smiles constantly! I have a husband who is working hard to teach young cadets... the future of the Air Force, and still be my rock.

A busy month? It's only just begun!!

Loving Conference!!

I keep a notebook of my impressions during conferences and here's what I learned yesterday:

Write down your impressions, Ponder them - study the meaning for your own life, pray, when you feel the peace, be thankful. I've always written down impressions from talks, conferences etc, but what I don't do is go back and ponder them, then find the meaning for the impressions in my own life. I love that!

Burdens - how long can we carry our heavy burdens in life? We must do everything we can to carry our burdens well. Burdens become blessings - be humble and have faith. As I live up to my covenants, the Lord will help me carry my burdens.

Missionary work saves lives. Stretch ourselves.. Aim High! If I rely on the Lord, he will help me do what I think is impossible. Learning and stretching is NOT OPTIONAL (darn it).

We are not alone. The most powerful help is always available. Give the best of ourselves. Get a little better everyday.

Temperance - refrain from anger (very tough for me currently), be humble, exercize retraint, be gentle and full of love. Use moderation in all things, use self-control. Seek righteous goals. Security for our families comes from temperence. Be patient with afflictions - be far from anger.

We are never left alone. We have the ultimate communication with our Father - prayer. Listen to the promptings from the Holy Ghost, then act on those promptings.. it will PROTECT you. Keep that channel in your mind clean, and unspotted from the world so you can hear the Holy Ghost.. Feel him. Prayer truly is our one constant to our Heavenly Father. Ask and you shall receive, then listen for the answers.

Thanks to you who have left sweet supporting comments on my blog. I hope to be back among the living soon, but still struggling with things... Someday I hope to be able to talk about it.. but so emotional for me! I feel like so many of the talks yesterday were for me... love and forgive. When someone you love hurts you so deeply, it's hard to do both.. but over and over again throughout the talks, it was said. I know I have to... I need to find my strength.

Don't Ask Why

I really try hard to follow that advice. If you are asking why, then you are lacking faith. Wayne tells me that I have more faith than any person he knows. He knows lots of people, yet I find myself this week asking why... a lot.

I handle things differently than most people I think. I know some people tell everyone their problems.. I'm sure it helps to talk it out. I would burn out friends if I did that. Some people live their lives as victims... always blaming the past for their struggles and problems. I embrace my past and know that I am who I am because of it. Some people, like me, lock myself away and just work it out. I don't answer the phone, the door, and I usually just stay home... often in my jammies... and I just work through it. It doesn't happen terribly often, but this week... you guessed it, I'm having to work through some things. AND, I'm asking why?

Why was my husband non-volunteered to Colorado for 18 months? Why do they now intend to send him on a year long remote? He's already been gone 9 months... the longest time we've spent apart in our 24 years of marriage. Sure, we could sell the house and go, but why? When they've threatened to send him on this remote the whole time he's been in Colorado.. sure we'd move there, and then he'd be gone a year. Why would we want to do that? Why am I so angry with my husband for being gone? Why am I feeling such hate with our situation?

Why did I end up with all these health problems? This is a biggy for me. I used to be this healthy, thin person who was active and had energy. I've turned into this fat and tired person.. that I barely recognize. Why does a chronic illness have to be so brutal?

Why do I feel like such an awful mom? Why is single parenting so hard? Why can't I get the answers I'm seeking? Why, in a world of millions do I feel so alone? Why can't I just suck it up, and move on? Why? Why? Why? (you can hear the whining)

Eventually, not yet, I will stop asking why. Eventually, not yet, I will answer the phone when people call. Eventually, not yet, I will open the door for visitors. Eventually, not yet, I will be myself again.

I can't be the only person who struggles with the "why me" syndrome from time to time. Or am I? Am I the only one who lacks faith? oops, there I go again... why?

Happy Birthday Hannah and Kayleigh

The beautiful cakes....




The Disney Castle...




The presents...


And the little princesses...